Transcript of: Video Store Sphynx
Video store clerk: Uh... Hi there, can I help you with something?
Sphynx: Yeah, I'm trying to find recent movies in an format other than friggin' DVD. Do you have any movies on betacam cassette or laserdisc or selecavision? Can you help me out at all?
Video store clerk: SelectaVision?? Isn't that from like 1982? No, I'm sorry, we pretty much just carry DVDs. Why do you not like DVDs?
Sphynx: I can't manipulate those fiddly little discs! I can't! It's like trying to pick up a dime with boxing gloves on, I mean forget about it. I really want to find some movies in a larger format, but I've been to five places and all anyone seems to have are DVDs.
Video store clerk: Well, yeah, it's really the superior format right now...
Sphynx: Well, if I can't even pick up the friggin' things and get them into the player then it's NOT the superior format, IS it??
Video store clerk: You're right, you're right! I guess it's just the ACCEPTED format, but it's unfortunately the only format that new films are released on. Well, that and Blu-ray.
Sphynx: Oh, don't you talk to me about Blu-ray!! It's just the exact same little coaster as DVD – Talk about a scam! The clerk at Blockbuster video was trying to sell me on the stupid things and I was like "Dude, you're not listening to me! I don't have fingers!" But he wouldn't quit! I don't like to eat this late in the evening, but in his case I made an exception!
Video store clerk: Okay, great! Well, I don't think you'll need to devour ME, because I have the solution to your problem!
Video store clerk: Forget about formats! What you need to do is get your movies online! iTunes and Netflix and a few other places are renting and selling movies as digital downloads now, so you can just avoid the whole physical media problem altogether. No more fiddly little discs! You'll be able to get all the new releases, and you'll be ahead of the game too because digital media I can guarantee you is the wave of the future. I'll even write down the web addresses for you here, and you can go check out the various websites and get yourself set up!
Sphynx: HELLO! KEYBOARD!
Video store clerk: I'm sorry! I'm sorry!!